Hidden: The End....

Something miraculous happened. We barely slept due to starvation. This morning when my dad stood by the opening of the cavern to view the outside world, he saw loaves of bread laying there right by his feet. Oh, we were so hungry that we took at least 30minutes to eat. The most amazing thing is that there still are leftovers after at least the ten (or more) of us feed ourselves. God provided us. This experience made us wonder a little. I was thinking if God is keeping us alive when we could've died, what does that mean? Are there more obstacles to bear until he comes? Is it to test our persistence, trust, hope, faith (etc.) in Him? I don't know. Random thoughts just come across my mind every moment of the day. 

There is nothing much to do in our hiding place, except discussing about the Word of God. Ofcourse, we are very glad to have valuable, precious moments like these because we knew we could've been in a worse situation. As to what the rest of world is up to, we don't have the slightest clue. Though, you can tell by common sense that things are getting worse. Sometimes, the dark smokes fill up the clouds, and it's very depressing. There might be some wars and rage going on out there. In moments like these, I feel thankful to God for guiding us throughout our journey. Looking back at my life in city a few months before, things are really displaced now. Despite the lack of food, the physical pain, and the anxiety I had to suffer now and then,  I'm extremely grateful for the quiet and peaceful moment amid the crazy events occurring in this current world. Who knows when I will live through times like this will ever again? 

———

 

I'm afraid... I won't be able to write again. There's was a huge explosion near our place yesterday after I wrote to you. The heat of the wave and maybe the radiation, or worse, the chemicals affected us. These agonizing boils, rash, and blood pouring from our bodies. My hands are really painful right now as I'm writing to you. But I don't want to abandon you. I might as well write while the pain is in its lowest stage. With all these burdens, we can't manage to escape again. Our conditions are much worse in reality, so you won't completely understand.

Oh! NO! My body is experiencing new symptoms. Our cave is like a hospital full of traumatic patients. My heart is convinced that Jesus is here with us. I want to believe so. Crying and wailing won't help our pain. That would only worsen it. I received help from my sister to write to you, but as her illness is worse than mine, I'm off on my own. I won't be able to write again. My hands are aching in pain. I want to write my last words and feelings to you. Hope is the only thing that motivated us to live our life without giving up. My family and I, are patiently waiting for Jesus' arrival — our ONLY hope. We might still be alive, or we might decease. But what does that matter as long as we are ready for Him? Already living in Him. 

Hidden: Lacking Food

The rest of my family and the hunting group returned to the cave with a decent amount of food for today. They were fairly shocked, and glad to find me fully awake. It's unnecessary to trade conversations right now. We automatically get that everyone has been fighting against some kind of hunger. For me, I realize how hungry I was until I catch a glimpse of the miraculous source of food they have gathered. Foods that were only available to us in the city (pre-hiding time): plenty of fruits, vegetables, nuts, and meat for the non-vegetarians. Little time was wasted, and more time was spent on feeding our empty stomaches. With a great relief, we had a long conversation after the meal.

~ It won't be long before we either survive or die from starvation. This cave secured us inside the confinement of its walls. It doesn't provide food, or safety outside. Because of the lack of food resources near our area, different groups must risk their life to search for edible things farther into the woods. If only this is possible. We had food for today, but what about tomorrow? You see, one of the younger guys in out group reported that most of the woods were in fire, leaving the ground with ashes. Less food. If they could've seen it beforehand, more foods could've been collected. But they didn't. We have no clue if it's the act of nature or humanity. We don't know, therefore, we are stuck in here for protection. 

Is this the end? Dying from starvation? O God, only You know everything. I — everyone of us long to be with you in heaven. The wages of sin is death, but are there any spark of hope for us to live in you forever? 

Hidden: The Martial Law

I regain my consciousness of reality in the middle of nowhere. I am sitting against a tree bark. How long was I asleep? The trees block my sight in every direction. Does my family survived? Am I really alone here? My vision is still blurred. Tears sprinkle down my face without my command; tears that are irrevocable. This once beautiful place is surely damaged by the menacing storm. As my vision cleared, I  began to look for my family and the rest of our group. 

The chilly wind is blowing my face as I find my way through the fallen trees. I spot something rare with my peripheral vision. It looks white — like a paper. This is a newsletter used for communication, so I pick it up and read the letters on the page. This particular page includes news such as the beginning of executing rebels, the unity the government successfully brought among the major population of the earth, and some other entertainment news. I am very grateful for the update until something attract my attention. The headline reads 'Mission To Hunt Rebels Outside The City [Martial law]'. This is self-explanatory. 

Before the storm hits, the government must have started their mission. Seems like they weren't too far behind us for this paper to get here. I sense right away that God is providing me some vital information. All of a sudden, I feel numb as my mind is urging my body to find my parents. My body is weakening — ....

I hear my mom and dad calling my name. Moments later, my brother and sister joined. They are safe, aren't they? But why am I not seeing their faces? 

My eyes finally open. I'm in a small, dark cave. There was a fire, and there is my sister beside me. I sit up from my lying position as my sister's eyes meet mine. Without hesitating, I asked "What happened? Where were you guys? Where in the world are we? Where's mom and dad and our brother?". The questions that didn't enter my mind filter. Surprisingly, my sister calmly explain to me what has happened. 

It's been four days since they found me lying on the ground with the newsletter in my hand. When my parents found out about the martial law, they made the decision to run toward the river they had located earlier. They carried me along with them. Some people that followed us observed traps, but it's too late for them to warn my father before he stepped on one of them. That's when he dropped me, and the net enclosed me instead of him. Fortunately, one guy brought a pocket knife with him. After that incident, the group rushed towards the river, crossed it, and found a cave for temporary shelter — that's where we are now. 

No one is sure if the traps have some kind of detecting device. Why would it matter? God can do anything beyond human's abilities. He has the authority and power to protect us as long as we believe in Him. Currently, the rest of my family and a couple of guys are going out to look for food, while some stayed with us. Ironically, my mind is in the most peaceful stage right now ever since the beginning of this hiding thing. I guess it's a sign of assurance from God. I can see it in everyone's faces. 

Hidden: A Storm

It has been several days since we settled in this location. My body was filled with goosebumps whenever my sister made the statement, "We have foods and clothes to wear. But we don't know much about this place, yet. What if this place is vulnerable to storms and disasters?". I know she cared much about safety more than any of us, but I had the feeling that some disastrous storm might attack us whenever I hear the statement. Looking back, it's like I secretly possess a sixth sense. It sounds nonsense, but it's partly true.

After sunset, we formed a fire and beddings on the grass. The weather had gotten colder as the night arrived. The clouds of darkness spread over the sky. No one knows what might be coming. Suddenly, a blast of wind blowed through the trees and reached our hiding place. Our bonfire was extinguished. Screams, shouts, and painful tears cried out amidst the chaos. Someone bravely shouted, "Do not be afraid for God is with us. Everybody come this way, and let's stay close to one another." Everyone head towards the familiar voice. Momentarily, the rain began to pour down on us. I shiver like a wild dog. This is a horrific nightmare. I couldn't hear the sound effects of lightning and thunders clashing down the trees. This place is mostly dangerous for thunderstorms.

I don't understand which is worse — being executed by the government, or suffering and dying from natural disasters. I push the thought away as I held onto my mom and sister's hands tightly. The world is fading away in my head. The space is empty with blackness instead of brightness. At least it's quiet and peaceful here. I don't want to wake up and see my loved ones dying or hurting. I wish I could stay. 

 

Hidden: Moving On...

The time has come when this place no longer provide safety for us. Our nights are restless and frightening. One time, we spotted some campers when we gathered foods. They were laughing and talking about hunting down animals. Everyone is warned to avoid association with obvious strangers. By the morning, my parents and other adults are willing to run somewhere else deeper into the woods. This means risking our lives. We pack our few belongings anyway to begin another journey. 

As we head farther away from the city into the wilderness, the weather changes from sunny and dry to rainy and wet. All of the younger children like my siblings and I are tired and worn out by the time the sun set in the horizon, far beyond our reach. We have walked the whole day through thorns and bushes. Our bodies are filled with rash and scars from cuts. The mothers care for our wounds as some of the fathers stayed while some search for meal. After the sun has completely set, we make beds out of the leaves, and a small fire to keep ourselves warm before sleeping. Everyone must be exaggerated.

It was almost sunrise when I wake up. My brother and sister, my parents, and several people are already busy. It's another day for us to continue our journey. For the next few days, we will be detecting a safe location for temporary settlement as we walk into the wilderness. We don't have abundant resources, and we don't know what's waiting ahead of us or what's chasing behind us. We can only hope and pray as we go. 

We finally are settling down into a grassland, surrounded by heavy-leafed woods. The good thing about this place is that it is hard to spot from faraway. Even though the ground is rough and uneven, the place is well hidden from above, below and around; there is no wide opening between the trees. I believe that God leaded us at this place. It is one of the best places one could ask for after days (and some nights) of walking. There are some foods near the area, so access to food will be much easier. I am physically and mentally worn out. Though, my fears on wild animals is not helpful. All I want to say is God is still good as always! 

Hidden: A Conflict

By this time, I am certain that everyone of us in hiding is very opinionated and stubborn. I wonder how long this will last, but it won't ease our hardships. The interesting thing about our group is our diversity. We are people from around the world only united by our beliefs. The diversity can create some arguments on what to eat, telling others what to do — just mainly on the personal beliefs. I bet it's really hard for some people to just go with the flow in this type of situation. But that's kind of ironic. 

Yesterday night, the adults were discussing about where to go next. It sounds too depressing, so I left and go to sleep. It was only for a short period of time before the voices woke me up. Mr. Piper, in his 60s, was accused of shenanigans. For some reason, that sounds silly to me because we barely have any valuables. Maybe it's just my family. I don't know what the other's possessions to this point in this place. Poor Mr.Piper. I barely know him, but some people say he's a greedy old man who always deny. We are blanketed in desperation. If stuff like this —finding faults in each other —repeatedly occurs, it wouldn't get safer for any of us since matters might be worse in the city. Who knows where we might end up in the next few days? 

Hidden: The Sickness

Our days are becoming more miserable and stressful. The weather was awful for the last couple of days. One day it's hot and rainy, and cold and sunny the other. Some people in our group are getting sick due to the unpredictable weather changes. Most of the illnesses are not as serious as some. However, my friend Leah's disease is getting worse every day with different symptoms attacking every other day. We are nearby the middle of the jungle. She can't go back to find treatment in the hospital. Surely, the dirty condition in the wilderness offers no pain relief. Instead, it created infections that worsen to the point it's even painful to look at her face, which were full of puss. As none of us are medically experienced, our only hope was one of our companion Old Venus; a former doctor at the famous Kwell-Ditor Hospital. Without the resources that were available back in the city, all she could do was to use some of her knowledge on plants and their healing powers. The plants would relief the pain for no more than what seems to be an hour. After a couple of days and nights of switching leaves, Old Venus declares she'd no idea what this illness is and afraid that it might be uncurable. We encouraged Leah to stay strong and fight the evil disease; that she could win this battle; that she can't give up. But there's nothing we could do except pray; saying a prayer to our Heavenly Father for protection over everyone and Leah. Three days later, Leah had given up on her battle. 

We still pray everyday. But by now every one is losing some kind of physical, emotional and mental wellness. For me, my mental/emotional wellness is deteriorating. I can't comprehend what I see. Leah's dead two days ago, and I don't feel anything. I don't feel any pain and fear. She's my friend, and I love her. Sometimes, she's the only one that can understand my confusing life. Now I find myself sitting here waiting. Waiting for I-don't-know-what. Maybe for the interminable crisis to end? How despicable of me to avoid talking to Leah's parents. How they would feel losing their only daughter,that could only keep them going, now deceased— I can not know. I'm not even sure if they are in their right senses unlike me. The only thing my selfish little mind want is to leave this place alone. But all I wish is for someone to wake me up from this bad dream.